my vocabulary is too small

Yes. She does. And my weekend ended with me sitting five rows away from it. It plus a just-was-pregnant Amy Poehler. But let’s start from the beginning. The ghost of the-weekend-of-December-19 beckons…

Friday: Was at office. Long story short, Gutbucket was taking place, picked up my shit, and left. Met Pete Holmes and TJ Miller (claim to fame? He played Hud, the guy who held the camera in Cloverfield) on my first trip to the Upright Citizen’s Brigade Theatre. Spelled theatre, not theater, by the way. If you spell it theater, they’ll stab you. By “they” I mean the ghosts of 26th Street and 8th Avenue, and by “stab you” I mean they won’t. And with the last two sentences, I just made “long story short” into “long story short completely irrelevant.” I’m not sure why I was surprised they were funny, but I was. Best open mic I ever attended. Good karma, by the way, as I brought the good comedic energy over to my performance Saturday night.

Saturday: Wrote a completely new set…that worked. If I can extract the audio, I will for y’all, since the producer’s camcorder broke again. Thanks Jym, Max, and Lara for coming out.

Sunday: I love Ken Jeong. I love Knocked Up. I love Ken Jeong in Knocked Up. I love Knocking Up Ken Jeong. I Ken Jeong Up Knocked (what the hell just happened)? Until 7:30 PM (what the hell just happened?), when I skipped off to watch ASSSSCAT. Bitches.

Strangely enough, Sam Brown from the Whitest Kids U’ Know was there. Almost as interesting as the time I pissed next to Rudy Gay.

Okay, I’m going to stop posting recaps like this. Not only do I hate these, I’m sure you do too. I almost just do it so I don’t forget what happens. In ten years, I want to look back at this crap and say, “Wow, I did that crap on that crap day.” I’m sure it will be very satisfying. If not, at least I can then force my future children to read it to learn that their father is a horrible writer. It will be a good punishment. “You’re not scared of a time-out? Huh? You wanna read daddy’s blog? Yeah, that’s what I thought. So quit crying. Jerk.”

—
Update on financial progress:

Total support to date: 23 people
Previous dollar TOTAL: $8.05
How much I made from 6th Bringer Show: $15
Cost of DVD from 6th Bringer Show: $0

TOTAL: $23.05